What’s New Nose Hair?

by blank at 11:27 PM on February 11, 2004

So, I’m sitting at the computer picking my nose and having a hard time because it’s not one big booger. It’s like someone took a glue stick and smeared it all around in my nose. A glue stick like the one I have at work, a job that I lost sleep over last night because of a stupid little event. I’m convinced that computers are sentient and wait for the most inopportune time quit working/freese/crash. They do it on purpose just to fuck you over in order to show you who’s in charge. My computer’s goal was to get my boss pissed at me for missing an instantaneous deadline she put on me. This morning I prepared for a bitchfest, but it never came. All that anxiety for nothing. Like this nose picking, it’s not accomplishing much.

As if it was my fault to begin with anyway. Equipment fails and you can’t always expect someone to come through at the drop of a hat every time. Right? Three and a half years there without any major flub up, what was I worried about anyway? All I’d have to do is sit and apologize and it’d be over in no time.

Like it’d be that easy. My boss can be a freak. One time I was helping out with the magazine by doing some corrections on ads. A job I don’t normally do. Somehow an ad I worked on didn’t get placed back in the mag. It happened somewhere between me and the guy placing them. We caught the mistake on the blueline, but it cost an extra $60 in alt. charges. Sixty dollars. Gaskets were blown and an emergency meeting was held to figure out what went wrong. She made us tell her what happened and how we could keep it from happening again, like we needed a lesson on cooperation. Clichés like “90 percent of problems are caused by poor communication” were drooled out. What an insult! I was “this close” to pulling out my wallet and throwing 60 bucks on the table and saying “problem solved!”

After that I started to realize why my office had such a high turnover rate. I was so annoyed that I started looking for a new job and came up with nothing except an interview at Wal-Mart’s corporate headquarters. I laughed the whole way back from Arkansas. What was I thinking? They called for a second interview and I said “no”. Disappointed, I let the job hunt go and accepted my fate. I was going to be stuck in my cube for a while. Then last Friday four job openings appeared in my email from friends and I applied to three of them getting three interviews set up.

I don’t know if the lecture about yesterday’s fuck-up is going to hit tomorrow or the next day, I’m just not going to worry about it anymore. My nose is getting sore, so I better stop picking. Sometimes if you leave things alone they work themselves out.