You probably aren't a jonesing Bad Sam junkie like me. When comments and posts run dry, you don't turn in desperation to the Recent Comments. You don't find that most of the ones attached to your long-forgotten posts are just come-ons for casinos or something or other.
But MG, damn him, is still attracting lively comment strings on bad advice posts he typed in 2001! Witness:
My ex-fiance just cheated on me. I had received an email, and instead of believing the person emailing me, I believed her. We had planned on moving into a new house, but while I was making the preparations she was staying at here moms. I didn't believe the mails, stupid me, instead and believed and trusted in her while she had already showed herself to be a lier. She came over for 5 days and helped me take care of some of the more minor aspects of the move, in which time she gave something to me. I haven't gotten tested so I'm not completely sure what, but it took a while for it to start showing up. The person had finally got around to emailing me the pictures that they said they had, and it was her. She got some skin disease about a week before I left to get the new house ready, and the pictures had the rash she had developed in them, that was the one way I was possitive that it wasn't old pictures. Well, after this happened I tried calling to tell her that she had 72 hours to come get her stuff, but her mom told me that she had moved in with this guy. She has stolen a bunch of my shit and I want to make her pay for all she's put me through. If you have any suggestions email me at [insert actual email address here.]I'm very willing to listen to any ideas of revenge you may have.
Oh, and just so you know to stay away from the person, her name is [insert actual full name here] . She lives in [insert hick town here] and she's a lying slut. Then again, if you want to get laid, just tell her you have a kid on the way with another woman, but you aren't allowed to go around her, she'll fuck you and let you take pictures of it so you can send them to her fiance or boyfriend. My advice is to stear clear of the whore though.
by Robert at August 20, 2005 06:09 PM
Also, if you know how to get a pussy ass mother fucker out of his parents house so you can beat his ass, let me know. I've tried to hunt the fucker that she cheated on me with down, but he won't even leave the house.
Get this, she left me, a guy that has his own place and a job that pays above $9.75 an hour for a guy that lives with his mom and sleeps in the same room as his little brother. The guy is physically pathetic and doesn't have to balls to stand up for himself, let alone her. I'm a big guy, alright, i'm 6'4" 235lbs, and I can understand how he wouldn't want to fight me, but I feel I've earned the right to send this short, scrawny ass little bitch to the hospital. For a year now this guy has been running around town talking shit, but never has the sack to step up when I get in his face. All the little bitch can do is cry that his step-daddy will take care of me.
Well [insert actual full name here], grow youself a sack. You can bring your weak ass step-dad or who ever you want, but come get it. You know where I'm at, be a man and stop hiding because you're afraid.
Remember what happened back when you tried to wrestle me in [insert possessive form of actual name] apartment a year ago? You remember flying across the room? Remember how every time you talked shit you would turn tail and leave? Remember that fear, and you might be able to live through what I'm going to do to you. You have two choices, come to me on your terms, or I'll find you, where ever you are, what ever time of the day, I'll find you. Oh, you might be able to hide for a while, but it's just going to make it worse on you when I get ahold of you. Watch over your shoulder if you want, but I'll be there, waiting for you when you least expect it. You can't run forever, nor can you hide forever. Remember that.
by Robert at August 20, 2005 06:28 PM
My advice to Robert is to stop dwelling on your own problems and have some empathy for people with real problems, like Martha Stewart or Mike Hunt or Tom Sizemore. And by god, see a doctor.
The comment spam on the old comments are kind of annoying. Purely to help the sites have more links so that Google will rate them higher...
Hilarious quote from old post or wherever. liked your playing with people selling their house post too. You might be Jonesing BS due to writers's block/inertia of the rest of us or perhaps your avoiding writing material for the Novel you alluded to in an earlier post...
by chuckwoolery at August 23, 2005 10:52 AM
So that's what those damn things are up to ! And yeah this Robert is really blowing off some steam, no?
The book is going swimmingly BTW. I've finished Origin of the Feces, It Doesn't Pay to Blame the Jews and am working on Evolution in Motion.
by anna at August 23, 2005 11:34 AM