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anna

I'm not talking about the linens

by anna at 06:27 PM on September 23, 2004

This post has been modified to fit your screen.

The FCC's puritanical crackdown mustn't be working. I heard the following quiz on the radio today. (Gay readers should pretend they're of the opposite gender.)

Gals:
1 Have/Haven't used a sex tip from Cosmo.
2 Like rich or struggling artiste types.
3 Face or body.
4 Wear/Don't wear scarves to cover up hickeys.
5 On belly or boobs.
6 Talk dirty or moan softly.
7 Spit or swallow.
8 Been/Haven't been date raped.
9 Prefer top or bottom.
10 Rather give/get.

Guys:
1 Have/Haven't peeked at Cosmo sex tips.
2 Trashy or glamorous.
3 Tits or ass.
4 Wear/Don't wear turtlenecks to cover up hickeys.
5 Leave it on belly or boobs.
6 Talk dirty or moan softly.
7 Prefer he/she spit or swallow.
8 Been/Haven't been date raped.
9 Prefer top or bottom
10 Rather give/get.

So. What say ye?

comments (19)

To half-expect anyone to answer this crazy-ass quiz I guess I should: 1 Have 2 Glamorous 3 Ass 4 Don't 5 Boobs 6 Talk dirty 7 Swallow 8 Haven't 9 Bottom 10 Get.

by anna at September 23, 2004 7:24 PM


1. Haven't
2. Yes
3. Yes
4. No
5. Yes.
6. Yes
7. Swallow
8. Haven't
9. Bottom for everything except sex
10. Get

by snaggle at September 24, 2004 1:59 AM


Snaggle, pleased to be clarifying. Yes? No? I don't get it.

by anna at September 24, 2004 7:42 AM


C'mon people, I don't want to have to scroll up to figure out which question goes with what answer.

Gals:
1 Have/Haven't used a sex tip from Cosmo. Have.
2 Like rich or struggling artiste types. Struggling.
3 Face or body. Face.
4 Wear/Don't wear scarves to cover up hickeys. I would if I needed to.
5 On belly or boobs. Boobs, which don't require cover up.
6 Talk dirty or moan softly. Yes.
7 Spit or swallow. Swallow.
8 Been/Haven't been date raped. Haven't.
9 Prefer top or bottom. Top.
10 Rather give/get. Get.

by Linz at September 24, 2004 10:48 AM


1 Have/Haven't peeked at Cosmo sex tips. Have not
2 Trashy or glamorous. Glamorous
3 Tits or ass. Both, please
4 Wear/Don't wear turtlenecks to cover up hickeys. Wear them
5 Leave it on belly or boobs. see #7
6 Talk dirty or moan softly. Talk dirty, baby!
7 Prefer he/she spit or swallow. GULP!
8 Been/Haven't been date raped. Have not
9 Prefer top or bottom On top
10 Rather give/get. Give

by MrBlank at September 24, 2004 5:44 PM


Yeah when I scrolled up and down to reply and then reread it, my answer kind of lacked context. This is so much better. Quick, the dreaded weekend is coming. Let's hear from y'all.

by anna at September 24, 2004 6:20 PM


Hmm, well...

1 Have/Haven't used a sex tip from Cosmo. Haven't.
2 Like rich or struggling artiste types. Both.
3 Face or body. Face.
4 Wear/Don't wear scarves to cover up hickeys. Would wear.
5 On belly or boobs. Neither.
6 Talk dirty or moan softly. Yes.
7 Spit or swallow. Neither. Uptight.
8 Been/Haven't been date raped. Haven't.
9 Prefer top or bottom. I like variety.
10 Rather give/get. Variety!

by jean at September 25, 2004 3:36 AM


When I was young and speculation about various gal's tendencies was rampant, the spit vs swallow question was common. I always thought it was framed wrong. As Jean noted, many women do niether. But to actually spit seems messy and disrespectful to boot. Surely there are other options.

by anna at September 25, 2004 8:34 AM


Oh, I get it now. :)

1 Have/Haven't used a sex tip from Cosmo. Haven't
2 Like rich or struggling artiste types. Both
3 Face or body. Both, but a nice face can override a lackluster body
4 Wear/Don't wear scarves to cover up hickeys. Don't.
5 On belly or boobs. Belly
6 Talk dirty or moan softly. Moan
7 Spit or swallow. Swallow
8 Been/Haven't been date raped. Haven't
9 Prefer top or bottom. Bottom for everything but sex
10 Rather give/get. Get

by snaggle at September 25, 2004 4:14 PM


Surely at least one of our dear readers has been slipped roofies and taken advantage. The media makes it sound like it happens 24-7.

by a at September 25, 2004 7:37 PM


I've mentioned before that I have about 5 friends that this has happened to Anna. No need to be cavalier.

by Linz at September 27, 2004 11:39 AM


1 Have/Haven't peeked at Cosmo sex tips. Have

2 Trashy or glamorous. Glamorously trashy

3 Tits or ass. Ass

4 Wear/Don't wear turtlenecks to cover up hickeys. Wear them

5 Leave it on belly or boobs. Closest to where I'm working from or her preference.

6 Talk dirty or moan softly. A mixture of both is hot

7 Prefer he/she spit or swallow. Swallow

8 Been/Haven't been date raped. Have, sort of. (passed out drunk at a party and woke up to the deed being done by someone I didn't want to do *shudder*)

9 Prefer top or bottom Whatever gets her off

10 Rather give/get. Give

by Ezy at September 27, 2004 12:50 PM


No I sure didn't mean to downplay this horror Linz. To me it's probably worse than traditional rape due to the loss of trust factor.

Ezy, somehow, I figured that was your comment before I scrolled down to the name. You dawg!

by anna at September 27, 2004 6:19 PM


1 Have/Haven't peeked at Cosmo sex tips. - haven't
2 Trashy or glamorous. - trashy
3 Tits or ass. - tits
4 Wear/Don't wear turtlenecks to cover up hickeys. - Hickeys? Are we not adults? We can have intercourse, why would I want to give someone a hickey?
5 Leave it on belly or boobs. - belly
6 Talk dirty or moan softly. - moan
7 Prefer he/she spit or swallow. - what i prefer and what i get are two different things
8 Been/Haven't been date raped. - haven't
9 Prefer top or bottom - depends
10 Rather give/get. - get. but giving is nice too. it depends.

by mg at September 27, 2004 7:05 PM


Actually I made up the hickey question because I jsut think they are funny. A girl in my office wears scarves a lot and I kid her that she's covering up hickeys. One day I'd going to be in big trouble but I just can't stop myself sometimes.

by anna at September 27, 2004 7:37 PM


MG, you said what I was thinking about the hickeys.

I started wearing scarves this year because the store I'm currently working at sells them... People really seem to notice when I have one on. I'd thought it might have been because nobody wears scarves (or hats, and I love hats) in L.A., but now I wonder if it may be because they were looking for the hickey. :(

by jean at September 28, 2004 3:07 AM


I never understood hickeys. Where I grew up was redneck central. I remember redneck chicks used to wear hickeys like badges of honor. I don't think there are many turn offs worse than a bruised, nasty assed discolored neck. I avoided the hickey chicks like they were lepers. Yeeech!!

by Ezy at September 28, 2004 10:00 AM


Hats? I have an entire post about Hat People vs. Non-hat People. Suffice it to say that the neurotic compulsive kid-adopter Mia Farrow is a Hat Person. So is the flamboyant Christina Aguilera. Ditto for Billy Crystal. Clint Eastwood is not a Hat Person. Neither is Jay Leno. I think he mows his own grass.

by anna at September 28, 2004 10:03 AM


Mmmm. Honey, sit back and relax. I'm going to gnaw on your neck until you've got a nasty, discolored bruise. You'll love it. It's a way of life.

by anna at September 28, 2004 10:07 AM



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