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Larry, we hardly knew ye!

by effenheimer at 06:46 PM on April 30, 2003

I went to Iowa State and it always surprises me when attention is turned toward my alma mater. Usually it's pretty odd. I think Big Media wither cannot comprehend things happening outside large cities or it has the impression that anything that happens outside a large city is tinged with rural weirdness.

For example, it was a complete coincidence the Rodney King verdict coindided with our student run festival, Veishea, which had the occasional drunken riot. A riot broke out the same night as rioting broke out in LA over the verdict. ABC News and CNN were both on hand. Some jokers were chanting "Rodney King, Rodney King" and even Ted Koppel announced that rioting had broken out in Ames Iowa over the Rodney King verdict. It was nuts.

So right now, a lot of people are getting all worked up that Iowa State Basketball Coach Larry Eustachy has been busted getting his drink on with a bunch of students in Manhattan, Kans. and Columbia Mo. Apparently, Eustachy likes to lose games and then crash parties. Or at least he loses games and then likes to crash parties.

The most shocking thing pictures of Eustachy reveal was not him getting kissed on the cheek by coeds, but the shocking fact that even though he makes more than any other state employee in all of Iowa, he still drinks Natural Light. At the lowest point in my life, I never drank Natty Light. I just wouldn’t drink anything if things got that bad.

Apparently, Eustachy got verbally “fresh” with some 23-year-old “girls.” The way I figure it, if they’re old enough to get drunk at a frat party, they are old enough to get hit on by Larry Eustachy.

Who cares about this? Anyone? Besides boosters who are a bunch of uptight assholes who want students to sit down and shut up at games. It isn’t like Larry rides into these towns on the back of his battle stallion like a conquering Mongol to burn villages, do keg stands, shove honies in a gunny sack and ride hard back to Ames with his booty.

Frankly, Mr. Shankly, you pay a guy a lot of money, you expect he won’t act like a tool, but he still has a First Amendment right to assemble, to say what he likes and to get his swerve on. No laws have been broken. He supports the troops. Aren’t there more important things to kvetch about?

comments (12)

Yeah but it will all pass over in a week or two. Look @ Marv Albert who bit that chick on the ass. Or Coach Bobby Knight stuffing fans in garbage cans and throwing chairs onto to court. All is forgiven.

by Anna at April 30, 2003 7:09 PM

If it has anything, even remotely, to do with Sex/Race, it's something to 'kvetch' about in America, due to all the insecure pussies in the media these days. I must say, I'd have reason to believe that Eff, you're probably the biggest journalist/reporter covering this story anyways. I think Ted Koppel's to busy trying to look like a Keebler Elf.

by LOCKHEED at April 30, 2003 9:23 PM

This is classic. MU is such a party school. The offical remark to that accusation is something like 'so our students like to have a good time while they get a quality education'. What a joke.

by MrBlank at April 30, 2003 10:02 PM

Reminds me of the scene in Showgirls where the big star (who looked a lot like Kenny G to me) takes the black girl upstairs and rapes her.

Of course Larry didn't do anything close to that.... And he shouldn't be treated like he did. If they are that worried about it maybe someone should just tell him to grow up. Like sports figures (coaches or otherwise) ever do...

by ChuckWoolery at May 1, 2003 11:11 AM

ISU doesn't have the best of luck with coaches. Wasn't there another story last year about one of the assistant coaches getting canned because they found kiddie porn on his computer. Or, back when I first got to school, the football coach getting in trouble for beating his wife. Then of course, there was Tim Floyd who left to rebuild the Bulls. He didn't do anything bad, but I still think he is a tool.

by mg at May 1, 2003 11:22 AM

He is out. larry is suspended and will likely be fired. one of the reasons is that the story did get national attention from ESPN and Sports Illustrated. I dont think have a good time is that much of a problem and he is a youngish 47, but his alcoholism just got the better of him.

by eff at May 1, 2003 2:02 PM

Well, I don't know abotu that. Sometimes a stupid, seemingly little thing like this is exactly what an administration needs to get rid of a coach who is underperforming. I bet if they'd done better this season, there been no question of firing Eustachy. The team has underpreformed since he came on as coach, and getting blitzed at some keg party is a great excuse to get him gone.

by mg at May 1, 2003 2:47 PM

Knowing little but what I've read here, I agree with mg. If you are riding high, all is forgiven. People would rally around him more I bet.

by Linz at May 1, 2003 2:57 PM

Ten years ago, I would have said he's got to go. But after watching the media and all his apologists fall all over themselves to excuse Bill Clinton after the Lewinski thing, I decided that it doesn't matter what you do in your private life. Hey, if it's OK with Eustachy's wife, why should it bother me (How many times did we hear that during the Clinton years). I believe him if he says he was drunk while hitting on those co-eds. And if he lied, hey, everyone lies about sex (How many times did we hear that during the Clinton years). Eustachy has averaged 20 wins a year at Iowa State. Unless this effects his recruiting, he stays.

by Roberto at May 1, 2003 3:09 PM

Isn't Larry seperated? The girl he was kissing on the cheek while holding a Natty Light was fat anyways... you can't fire the man. He's already had enough embarrassment for kissing a fatty while drinking a Natty.

by Jon at May 1, 2003 4:15 PM

The b-ball coach I am interested in is that dude who coaches the Lakers. Is that guy even alive? If so he needs to crash a few keggers and pinch some serious ass. Get that blood flowing.

by Anna at May 1, 2003 8:04 PM

That "b-ball coach" is Phil Jackson dumbass. Anyway, I drink natty, and I haven't been to many parties where natty isn't the beer of choice, or for that matter, necessity. GO NATTY, anyone who doesn't drink it is a pussy anyway.

by Steve at February 16, 2004 8:54 PM

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