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Pure, Unadultered GREED

by eric at 07:20 PM on May 01, 2002

Name one industry that makes so much money it could have paid down the national debt when we had one. (Or do we again? I assume it's just a matter of time...)

If you said professional sports or big oil or well, any of a thousand industries except those that are Internet or magazine related, you're probably right. But, the one I'm pissed at now is the magic makers, the dream creators, the traders in make-believe: the movie studios.

Case in point: I'm cheap. While I like to hit the movies on very regular occasions, I do so usually before 6pm to get the matinee prices or by using various types of pre-purchased passbooks that let me get in for about six bucks, instead of the ridiculous $8.50. I know they'll make their money anyway, since I'm going to inevitably hit the concession for the jumbo tub o' corn and the large Sprite in the Harry Potter collectable glasses left from last November.

So today, I decide to make sure I'm not going to miss out on opening night of my current obsession, the over-marketed and who-cares-because-I'll-love-it Spider-Man. I went to the local Hoyts Cineplex at the mall and plunked down my CinemaCash for two tickets, my good man, and don't spare the Goobers.

Then the pimply-faced usher-boy pointed to the sign.

Under orders from the studios, no advance sales discount tickets will be accepted for the first two weeks of Spider-Man (or for Episode Deux: Attack of the Drones, either). I gave them my credit card and got the tickets anyway, of course. And that's just what the studios are counting on.

The first weekend of any box office release is always the biggest money making time, whether people use cheap tickets or not. By not allowing discount tickets during that time for what will be the two biggest money makers of the year (name one film that will make more. Minority Report? Ha.), it only serves to fill the coffers of the people who already have all the cash in the world and screws over those most important of people: the die-hard, don't-have-a-life fans that keep such franchises alive long after they should have passed on. (Yeah, I saw Batman and Robin and Superman 4: The Quest for Peace on their opening nights! I watched X-Files after Mulder left! I admit it!)

So when Spider-Man 4: Where Are My Tights? hits theaters in 2010, after a now tubby Tobey had dropped out of the role and it's been taken over by the kid who plays Dewey on Malcolm in the Middle, and Spidey's fighting villains like Paste Pot Pete and The Rocket Racer... well, I'll be there in line.

Because I paid for it today.

comments (3)

The kid who plays Dewey would so make a perfect Peter Parker in 10 years, OMG.

PS: you should all go read Eric's other (better) take on Spidey over at his own site. It is one of the best things I read on the Internet in a while. I thought I might have only liked it because it was about Spider-Man, and I love Spider-Man, but I read it again and no, it is just that good.

by mg at May 1, 2002 7:48 PM

Hey, I watched X-files too after Mulder left!

by Susanna at May 2, 2002 4:36 AM

Even the NY Times apparently loves Spider-Man! (Of course, I base this entirely on the headline I read, because I won't read any reviews until after I see it tonight, just in case someone should taint me with their opinion. It's happened before.... as I'm usually predesposed to liking things like Water World, yet hate that film.)

by Eric at May 3, 2002 12:24 PM

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