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What's A Battle?

by jesus at 01:16 AM on March 26, 2002

I usually sit down at night, in my comfy black leather chair I found in a dumpster behind Sears, and think random li'l thoughts to myself:

"Hmmm, I could write a post for Bad Sam!"
"Wow, I can play with the type!"
"Should I take over Nicaragua now or later?"
"Why do my socks always develop holes where the big toe is?"
"Is blankly staring at a computer screen a productive use of my time?""No, thank you. I don't like cheese.""What boring crap can I babble about for a post?"

So I'm sitting here with thoughts similar to those running through my head. I usually don't have anything particularly interesting to write about, and today is no different.

Soooooo...did anyone watch those Oscars? Wow! What a show! The people! The lights! The cameras! I didn't actually watch it, mind you, but I'm sure there were people there. And I'm assuming cameras were there, since people are endlessly fascinated by pictures of those with more money than themselves. And that would make lights necessary. And so on.

I did see a clip of Halle Barry on the news though, and that sufficiently pissed me off. I'm not sure how to say this in a kind, loving manner, so I'll just come right out with it: I HATE HALLE BARRY. I hate her I hate her I hate her. I wish she would just shut up about being black and how proud she is of being black and black this black that. You're half white! Why aren't you dedicating your award to a poor white girl?

Jesus Christ, I think I have like a quarter of a percent German in me; it doesn't mean I'm flying the old Black, Orange, and Yellow from a pole, or collecting Nazi memorabilia, or dining on sauerekraute and celebrating Oktoberfest. And was there a memo sent out awhile ago informing us we could arbitrarily choose which ethnicity or race we want to represent, because I think I missed that one.

And if you did get it, please forward it to me. I really wanna become more Japanese--they're so smart and efficient.

comments (1)

actually, you can arbitrarily choose the ethnicity or race you want to represent. it's something entirely up to you. of course, if you choose to represent something that you don't actually have any claim to, that will lead to other problems.

i watched barbara walters's interview with halle berry after the oscars and halle said that her mother (who is the parent that is white) raised her telling her she was black. apparently her mother did this to prepare her for dealing with the bigoted: bigots would not look at halle and focus on her caucasian heritage. they would focus on her african-american heritage.

by jean at March 28, 2002 12:08 AM

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