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sex machines : penile erector nail

by mg at 12:16 PM on June 14, 2001

In our ever continuing quest to elighten and educate our audience, Bad Samaritan presents the first in a continuing series on the illustrated history of sexual technology.

The first device is the Disposable Internally Applied Penile Erector. John Friedmann filed a U.S. patent in 1988 for the device that is shaped like a large plastic nail. Friedman explained, "To use the device, one merely slides the support tubing down the urethra of the user's penis until the concave disc at the end of the hollow support tube touches the head of the penis... the use of the urethra for insertion of the splint in conjunction with the anatomically correct disc 'mooring' and condom-like latex or rubber sleeves there will be no injury to the male or female involved in intercourse." Which is a good thing.

After seeing the hammer used to insert the plastic nail, hitting your thumb will be the least of your worries.

comments (15)

What the fuck kind of masochist would ever think up this contraption, let alone believe other men would rush (excuse the pun) out to buy one for a fun night with the Mrs.?!

Can we say, "Ouchy"??

by Lilly at June 14, 2001 1:09 PM

That is so frightening. And I thought catheters were bad...

by snaggle at June 14, 2001 1:52 PM

This is one of the tamest items in the collection. Just wait, it only get weirder and more disturbing as the weeks go on.

by mg at June 14, 2001 2:03 PM

Well good. One more site I can no longer read at work. . .

by space at June 14, 2001 4:47 PM

That brings up a good point Space.

Do enough of you read at work so that so that I should put the pictures in pop-ups, like I do with everything else, or should I keep the picture on the main page?

by mg at June 14, 2001 5:09 PM

Yeah, my boss doesn't like that kind of shit on the work computer in this office. But, then again, she is a total bitch! ;-)

by Lilly at June 14, 2001 5:44 PM

hell, that illustration was mild compared to some of the stuff my coworkers circulate via the company email...

by kd at June 14, 2001 6:17 PM

And then there's my workplace, where I joke — with the boss — about the boss's boyfriend making me wet.

by snaggle at June 14, 2001 11:19 PM

I first found this place when I audited my student's use of the computer. This was a site that the little middle school students were going to in droves.

Now, before anyone gets snaggly about this. I don't blame the site one bit. I blame our hopless web filtering software. My only recourse at this time is to disconnect the little monkeys until I can monitor there computer use in real time.

I'm writing this from home. I am a computer instructor and would advise people who use their work computers for any kind of personal use -- X rated or not, should learn this phrase, "Do you want fries with that?"

by Chris at November 25, 2001 7:04 PM

This seems like a much better option than the wiener nail:


by Chook_ at January 21, 2002 4:09 AM

Think I'll pass on the nail thing, I would like some fries though.

by Fallacy at April 29, 2002 7:56 PM

I wouldn't put a fry in there. Hot oil and genitals don't mix well. Believe me.

by mg at April 29, 2002 8:13 PM

Hot oil and genitals .... that sounds way too scary. Hot wax is so much better.

by Hellacious at April 30, 2002 7:55 PM


by ARCABRON at September 23, 2003 12:05 PM

That thing looks eerily similar to the Corona "Cockhead" Stimulator with Urethral Amplifier.

by zapped at April 23, 2005 8:20 AM

comments are closed