And his hair was perfect

by anna at 10:12 AM on October 03, 2005

I see there is a big debate raging about whether it's wise to rebuild New Orlean's impoverished 9th Ward, which lies several feet below sea level and bears the brunt of every major storm to hit the city, from Betsy in 65 to Katrina in 05. While I'd have to say the smart money is on demolition and reversion to its natural swamp state, I am not here to debate this contentious, racially-tinged topic.

(Though I must say it is odd that two well-to-do 'hoods just as prone to flooding as the beleaguered 9th are sure to be restored. Then again, people who live there have worked hard to obtain their money, power and prestige. They've paid a boatload of taxes, so maybe they do deserve preferential treatment.)

All of New Orleans must brace itself for an influx of hustlers, con men and their unsavory associates. I know this because my 'hood suffered a major hailstorm a few years back. This is nothing compared with a hurricane or a flood, but the aftermath is the same. You have this post-storm deluge of unnatural money i.e. money that wasn't earned through the normal channels of running businesses, working or stealing it.

This in turn attracts said flim-flam artists in droves. It's like you've filled up an Olympic-sized swimming pool with bourbon and invited all the drunks in the world over. From far and wide they will come, bearing promises of prompt repairs and restored dreamss.

If our experience with the roving bands of storm-hustlers was any experience, a lot of people are going to have their hopes dashed big-time. You see, even though they appear to have workers and tools and equipment on their out-of-state pickup trucks, these guys don't ever actually perform any work.

They are experts at securing contracts, snagging the front money and then flying the coop. They get away with it in dealing with shrewd insurance companies with loads of experience at spotting scammers. (I work for one. Trust me, they are good at spotting fraud. Their livelihood depends on it.)

Contrast that to their latest mark, FEMA. People who run FEMA have no vested financial interest in protecting its taxpayer-funded capital from charlatan rebuilders. And you saw just how adept they are at their purported business in the post-hurricane debacle. They claim they're good at disaster relief but really they are just a disaster. Mr. Bush has promised to pay whatever it takes to put New Orleans back on the map. Well, what it will take is everything. The only winners will be Federal employees who cash their paychecks whether their work is good, bad or indifferent. (I've lived in the DC area all my life, so this too I know.)

Them, said scammers and persons who are smart enough to take the Feds' money directly and hightail it out of the bayou post haste, before the swarm o' thieves descends with its coffers wide open.

And the Saints. Go Saints! They are now playing at the Alamodome in front of a mixture of paying customers and resident refugees from Katrina. And they won yesterday. Bully for them. But don't expect them back at the sacked Astrodome any time soon, or ever.