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Out and about
by leaffin at 05:38 PM on September 25, 2005
This weekend, I headed to the Twin Cities to spend some time with my brother and take him up on his offer of a free U2 ticket, so long as I went to the concert with him. My brother and I have slowly started to bond a bit more over the last few years, and who can pass up U2? I took off from work a bit early on Friday so my bro and I could head downtown before the show to catch a bite to eat. While nurturing a couple of beers and food, my brother asked me that fateful question: "So, are you dating anyone?"
In my head, I had a debate that lasted for all of about 2 seconds ("Should I tell him? Yes! No! Are you crazy? Psst... tell him!"), before I blurted out that yes, I am seeing someone. And her name is Meg*. (*Name has been changed.)
I came out to my brother. And with that short discussion with my brother, my perspective has changed completely. I was nearly 100% sure that my bro would be cool with the fact that I date women, but the actual step of telling him has become a catalyst for all sorts of thoughts. Practically within the span of a couple of days, my brain has abandoned the thoughts of bisexuality that have been gripping it for the past year.
Maybe I'm just giddy about Meg and the wonderful butterflies you get when you start seeing someone new are taking over. Maybe I'm just in another phase of my life where I'm leaning towards the gay end of things as opposed to the straight end. Maybe I'm afraid of social connotations of the term "bisexuality", but right now, my brain, my hormones, and my body are telling me that I don't want to date men. I've stopped noticing them or thinking about any of them in a sexual way, and I'm floating on a little cloud. So thanks for asking, bro.
comments (10)
Man, you sure know how to drop a bombshell. For some reason, I find this news surprising. Good luck with Meg.
I have always thought that it must take a lot of courage to make the first move in a gay or lesbian romance. Seems like the rejection would somehow be worse.
by anna at September 26, 2005 7:40 AM
Thanks, Anna! It's just a bit harder to find people within your dating pool... if you go up to someone in a mixed setting (straight and gay) and ask them out, THAT takes courage.
by leaffin at September 27, 2005 8:48 AM
Oh yeah, my brother was completely cool with it. He had a poker face at first, then asked a few questions. I don't know if he was expecting it or not. I didn't ask. I felt slightly awkward during the conversation. A friend was telling me that of course I'd feel awkward - it's basically telling your family that you have sex and now hey have to think about that. And in a different way than they'd thought.
by leaffin at September 27, 2005 8:52 AM
Geez those link whores piss me off. Die "discojew" die
Anyway, Leaffin, huh. Nice to see you have a supportive family (or brother at least). Conversations like that can bring out the worst in people, and its nice to see that your brother apparently doesn't have that worst in him.
Congrats on coming to the decision and being honest with yourself and all. Hope Madison is a good fit for the Lesbian thing and all. I imagine it would be, given the big University population. I'm sure we'd all appreciate the odd update on how that's treating you.
by chuck woolery at September 27, 2005 10:29 PM
And any pictures! Oops did I say that out loud?
Is your brother the first member of your family you told? It's always a little scary telling something so personal to someone so close to you. I'm glad it went well.
by Long Time Lurker at September 28, 2005 2:04 AM
Thanks for the support, everyone. Yup, bro's #1. I didn't even plan to tell him.. for several years now, everytime someone from my fam asks if I'm dating anyone, the answer has been "no", and I've started to get a bit closer to my bro the last year or 2, so I decided not to lie to him this time around. And I"d had a beer.
Yup, Madison, also known as the "lesbian capitol of the US", or at least that's the rumor. However, if I get the job as a tour leader, I'm going to be kissing Madison and it's pretty ladies goodbye to return back to the Latinas, who appear to all be straight.
I have naked pictures from our first date posted at ....
by leaffin at September 28, 2005 2:41 PM
Good going Leaffin! That definitely took a lot of courage. I'm glad that your brother was understanding. And I'm glad that you're so happy with your girlfriend! Everyone should be so lucky.
by jean at September 29, 2005 1:16 PM
First time I've read this, even though I've been posting recently. All I have to say is: "Bah! There goes another one."
Having never experimented with men, and having absolutely no desire to ever, EVER experiment with anything not sporting a natural, been there since birth vagina... I gotta ask. You know when you stopped looking at men, right, but when did you START looking at women? Strikes me that those who fade from Bi to Gay, or Bi to Straight... kind of fall for 'the one' they find belonging to either sex, the one, just the right sorta person. The actual sex (of that person) is irrelevent, it's just that that person is one ya click with. One that fits. And it could have, for arguments sake, been somebody of either sex.
That true?
by Ex Crimson Guard NCO at November 2, 2005 4:32 PM
I think Gore Vidal said we are all bisexual to some extent, but he's gay.
by anna at November 5, 2005 8:28 AM
I love you anna and I want to have your baby!!!
by Long Time Lurker at November 6, 2005 12:47 PM