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Sneaking through the alley with Sally
by anna at 08:14 PM on March 02, 2005
This has been a weird smoking week for me. I smoke, but I'm on a business trip with a bunch of people that don't. This means a lot of awkwardness, what with the need for breaks, the awful smells, people rolling their eyes about said smells etc. I've set new records for going without just to avoid dealing with all these issues. In fact, I'm very near being able to quit. But back at the hotel, it's been a different story altogether. I make up for lost time by smoking like a chimney.
I ordered a smoking room but then thought better of it due to those awful, stale smells of smoke in a closed room. The types of people who stay in smoking room are hardcore smokers and they smoke a lot. No matter how good the ventilation, the buildup is just intolerable. (Myself I don't even sit in the smoking section at restaurants for the same reason: the sheer concentration overwhelms me and I feel I am going to suffocate any minute.)
So I found this cool little out-of-the way place to pursue my evil vice in peace. It's the staff entrance. There's often staff members lolling about, smoking. So I have someone to talk to, which is good. But the night before last I was there around 10 PM. It's like an alley adjacent to this swamp area. Spaghum moss hangs from live oaks and cypress trees. Naturally occuring Rhododendron trees (not bushes) abound. There's all manner of vines and strange animal sounds. I imagined that there were snakes and gators out there. Completing the effect, along with the pungent dumpster odors, was these six whirring, industrial-sized AC units creating this wind tunnel type of effect.
I'm taking all this in, kind of awed by it all. I become aware of a squat, pot-bellied black man standing there in profile in the shadows. He isn't smoking. Not is he talking to anyone. He's just.... standing there in this weird, out-of-the-way spot where I figure nobody but me, the maids and the bartenders I've met belong. He stands there, seemingly going nowhere and unaware of my presence.
Suddenly I'm gripped by this maniacal fear. I've got $200 in my wallet, and I'd have gladly given it to him had he accosted me. Then I'm engulfed by this strange guilt. Is it racial? I have no rational reason (other than those listed above) to fear this man. Hell if I know. All I know is I finished my smoke in a hurry and scurried up to me room, shaking like a leaf.
Last night I encountered him again. He and some other guys were working on a headlight of an old truck. I know a bit about these things and volunteered that he needed to replace the entire harness, not just the bulb. Otherwise the vibration will just cause it to get loose again. And you need to do them in pairs, cuz that's how they tend to wear out. He's glad to hear this and shows me that I've been needlessly sticking my room card into the entry thing all this time. They've rigged it up so it is disabled and they can come and go anytime they want in the hotel. So much for all their elaborate security.
I'm totally at ease with him and his buds. Somehow it's totally different when he's there for a reason and not just lurking idly. I still haven't totally come to terms with these odd encounters. And since we've finished up early, I am coming home. I'll sort it all out then. After I give my wife a big kiss. Man, I've missed her. We've never been apart this long.
comments (6)
Aww, how sweet! About your wife, not the pot-bellied man. Although that is sweet too in a more cosmic way. He was alright after all. Wow, I feel like I was there. I can't believe trees just drip with moss directly outside of hotels like that. That would get cleaned right off in California.
by jean at March 3, 2005 4:05 AM
I think it's the complete freedom to imagine what you will, that does that to you. And you just happened to imagine the worst possible scenario, worst reason for the pot-bellied chap to be standing there.
Maybe if you'd said "Hi." You wouldn't have done high-knees to your room. Heh heh. I remember working the nightshift in a call centre, and it was a smoke-free zone, but after exploring the building a little, with my headset still on, I found a door to the roof of the building, and would go up there to smoke. After a few cigs and visits over a period of days, I tried some of the doors up top. One was a sort of loft area for the elevator mechanics, like, the uh, the wheels and what-not, the stuff that makes it go up and down. Yeah, I'm mechanically minded, can't even label the... uh... Things that make the elevator work. *sigh* :/
Anyway, I couldn't even step over the threshold, all the whirring and clicking noises, total darkness and no light switch. All you could see was a table covered in empty plastic coffee cups from the machine... I imagined all kinds of shit in there, bodies chained to the ceiling, held by hooks... So I just closed the door and left it. Had there been a light I could have identified the source of the noise, and seen a ceiling lacking cadavers. And then probably gotten out of the wind to enjoy my smokes in the future.
Booga that though, no light.
by Ex Crimson Guard NCO at March 3, 2005 8:44 AM
I agree with Crimson. It is all in the context of where you are. If you are not famililiar with any given place things can start to freak you out.
Kids (and even some adults) will often have trouble sleeping in a strange house because of the noises at night. This does not mean that their own house doesn;t make noises, just different ones. We develop security with the things we are accustomed to.
This may even explain why so many people stay in relationships years after they know it is over. They are too scared of the unknown to venture beyond what they know will be there tomorrow.
If this alley had have been outside your favourite restaurant, or place of business you may have just assumed it was a man waiting for a ride. But then again you still moght have wet yourself regardless.
by dominathan at March 3, 2005 11:46 AM
Man, I could use a cigarette right now.
by mg at March 3, 2005 5:23 PM
I want to think it was just the weird confluence of sights and sounds and how odd it is these days to see someone just standing idly by, not planning to pummel you. But somehow I'm afraid there could have been a whiff of racism mixed in. And I hate that.
Hey Jean thanks for the props on the description.
by anna at March 3, 2005 7:13 PM
You're welcome Anna!
by jean at March 4, 2005 4:22 AM