« Just that I didn't think this would happen again | Main | Securely ignorant »
people are talkin, talking 'bout people, i hear them whisper, you won't believe it.
by mg at 10:35 AM on March 19, 2005
I hate the idea that someone might talk about me when I’m not around. That may come as a shock considering I’ve spent the last 4+ years doing what is basically an online, and very public, diary, but it’s absolutely true.
I think what it comes down to is not knowing how people really think about me. And, as long as it is just thinking, I can be kind of okay with it. But if that thinking becomes talking, and that talking involves another person… well, I’d rather not know. There are 6 billion people in the world, and if they have conversations about the other 5,999,999,999 people out there without me, that’s fine. But if any of those bastards are talking about me when I’m not in the room it makes me feel uncomfortable. What the hell could they be talking about?
A couple months ago I got into what can nicely be described as a verbal altercation with a co-worker. Now, I’d never have reason to mention it again, because that’s just the way I am. As not quick as I am to anger, I’m as quick to forgive. I think life runs better that way. If it’d been up to me, no one but the dozen people in the meeting where the incident took place would need to know about it, and it’d be forgotten as soon as we all left the room.
It never occurred to me that anyone would feel the need to tell anyone else about it. Except, people like to talk. And people love to gossip. Unless I planned to run around with a roll of tape and a ball gag and accosting my co-workers, there was nothing I could have done to prevent them from yapping, even if it had occurred to me that people might.
So, while I never expected the news to get around, it did.
Within an hour, someone came up to me and said “I heard about what happened with…” so-and-so. This was someone who also had trouble with the same person, so it made sense that they’d hear, but like a drop of water into a pond, the ripples had started.
Later that afternoon another person asked me about it. And another. Within a couple days I was hearing versions of the story that were so exaggerated that the simple, if heated, discussion actually involved punches being thrown. I’m sure by now people must think we were fighting Mortal Kombat style. I’m just lucky I never learned the key combination to rip someone’s spine out or I might be facing murder charges.
All in all, beyond the 5 or 6 people in the meeting, there were maybe 10-15 more who I know heard about it from someone. But, what freaks me out the most is all the people who heard about it, but never talked to me about. If 5 people asked me about, there most be 20 more who heard but didn’t mention it.
What wild stories did they hear? What misimpressions of me might they now have? Its driving me crazy.
comments (11)
Imagine what the world would be like if everyone minded their own business. If they heard a piece of information and the first question in their mind was, "What, exactly, does this have to with me?" If the answer is nothing really, they then tuned out the information. That would be the ticket.
by anna at March 19, 2005 2:20 PM
The Mortal Kombat comment made me laugh muchly.
by snaggle at March 19, 2005 7:42 PM
That's kind of a paradox Anna, if everyone was like that, then nobody would ever hear information that had nothing to do with them, because nobody would relay or retain information that had... No, wait... That's gotta be your bull...
... Aaah-I'm an idiot.
by Ex Crimson Guard NCO at March 19, 2005 9:13 PM
Yeah it is my bull. And every letter I type I have to click off an error message. The key to economic prose.
by anna at March 20, 2005 9:50 AM
I say, "That's gotta be your bull." when I fuck up. Hope you didn't take it the wrong way?
S'off the movie Tommy Boy, great flick, shite quote, but I say it all the time when I mess up, for some reason.
"I have de-railed."
by Ex Crimson Guard NCO at March 20, 2005 6:14 PM
Hopefully the people you report to at work know what really happened instead of the rumors. People really seem to love gossiping about work, especially to co-workers. I don't blame them, since there is so little job security now. They keep trying to figure out what the handwriting on the wall is, or if there is handwriting, or if there are people loitering by the wall with a Sharpie pen... :)
by jean at March 21, 2005 1:19 AM
And the flip side of that is that there is no company loyalty. We're all mercenaries now. I like it this way.
by anna at March 21, 2005 7:47 AM
Oh, and no I didn't take your remark any way Crim. I'm down with you.
by anna at March 21, 2005 6:29 PM
Get a life you stupid loser!!!!
by John at April 1, 2005 4:36 PM
Are you talking about me? You're talking about me, aren't you?
by mg at April 1, 2005 6:34 PM
Im an aussie and find your daily diaries of great psychological interest. After 4 years of entering your thoughts and daily life issues i find it intriguing 2 have witnessed your sad, rather tragic demise, 1st hand. Thanks very much you psychotic, crossdressing nutcase. Go Aussie, Oi Oi Oi
by barry lyons jnr at April 4, 2005 10:03 AM