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Maybe this year will be better than the last
by anna at 12:07 PM on January 01, 2005
I've heard that your personality is pretty much determined by the time you are like, six years old. A combination of nature, nurture and dumb luck makes you the person you are. It is like an irreversible disease. As John Lennon so aptly put it, there's nothing you can do but you can learn how to play the game. It's easy.
You're also saddled with your own set of physical attributes. You might have a large forehead or a unibrow. You might stutter or have an annoing facial tic. You might have an elongated nose like a ferret. You might have a tight pussy or massive dick. But it might now work right. You could have honey blonde hair that is frizzy or lacks body or luster. Maybe your breath stinks.
So the whole package is there for others to evaluate. In large measure this will in turn determine your level of success in the major arenas of life, such as earning money, having meaningful relationships with friends, self-realization and sex frequency/quality. Again, there isn't much you can do, aside from emphasizing the positive traits you possess and downplaying the bad ones.
Yet there is a huge industry centered around self-improvement. Use this technique or that and you will presto-chango become this highly successful human that glides through life with the greatest of ease. Yes, the world will be your oyster. This, of course, is pure unmitigated bullshit. You are who you are, for better or for worse. With any luck at all, you've found someone who can tolerate you with all your faults without deciding to Lorena Bobbitt or OJ you in your sleep.
The best story to come out in recent times was the one where this Chicago woman got raped. In the course of which she had occasion to gnaw off the man's dick. He's all whining at the ER about his misfortune, which he brought on himself. Cops arrested him and the newly minted eunuch will spend the rest of his miserable life behind bars, being passed around like a joint by his fellow inmates. Ha!
It's best to heed this sage advice from Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu: "Always we hope someone else has the answer. Some other time, it will all turn out. This is it: No one else has the answer. No other place will be better. And it has already turned out. At the center of your being you have the answer. Search your heart and see the way to do is to be."
Happy New Year, y'all.
comments (22)
Actual conversation this AM:
Ian: What's that under the Christmas tree?
Me: It's a shredder. You use it to tear up your bills and stuff so they can't steal your identity. Everyone's doing it.
Ian: Who would want to steal our indentities?
by Anna at January 1, 2005 12:15 PM
...SO MANY PEOPLE HAVE COME AND GONE... THEIR FACES FADE AS THE YEARS GO BY....
...YET I STILL RECALL...
by LOCKHEED at January 1, 2005 12:21 PM
Does the dawn and coming of a new year always have this affect on Americans? You're all becoming extremely melancholy... At least, I'm reading you all that way.
ANNA:- "You're also saddled with your own set of physical attributes. You might have a large forehead or a unibrow. You might stutter or have an annoing facial tic. You might have an elongated nose like a ferret. You might have a tight pussy or massive dick. But it might now work right. You could have honey blonde hair that is frizzy or lacks body or luster. Maybe your breath stinks. So the whole package is there for others to evaluate."
Heh heh, or you might have perfect features and a gorgeous slender figure with lovely soft yet firm breasts (Had Adriana Sklenarikova in mind), but when you open your mouth a heap of shit falls out in an irritating tone and all your beauty withers (Had a good looking semi-friend of mine in mind). There are no flawed people, only different tastes, and folk judging them in good or bad lights. If people are not happy with the way they look, they can make some changes. If no matter what changes they make they're still unhappy, then they're probably succumbing to some type of hermit existence in which compliments or appreciation as to whom they are severely lacking. There’s a huge industry for ‘making changes’ for people because the demand was there. People weren't/aren’t happy. So nobody talks to them? They assume, wrongly, it's because of the way look. It is likely because they're bad communicators, or perhaps they do have bad breath. Lot to be said for dental hygiene.
ANNA:- "With any luck at all, you've found someone who can tolerate you with all your faults... "
Or found those who warm to your strengths, and to your mind, and personality.
Philosopher Lao Tzu: "Always we hope someone else has the answer."
Answer to what? I have no such questions.
Existentialist Albert Camus: "You will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consists of. You will never live if you are looking for the meaning of life."
:)
by Ex Crimson Guard NCO at January 1, 2005 1:03 PM
Well I once read about this Penthouse Pet who was a member of Mensa, an acccomplished concert pianist and all that. I thought, she must be one royal bitch and a half. Marcus Aurelius said: "The first rule is to keep an untroubled spirit. The second is to look things in the face and know them for what they are." That is our new pal Crimson.
by Anna at January 1, 2005 4:05 PM
Crimson and Clover... yayaayayayayay... over n' over... yahahahaahahah..
by LOCKHEED at January 1, 2005 5:25 PM
I have an online contact whose alias is Clover... *sings* "American woman!"
Weird you should say that! I had a dream about her about two days ago too, induced I think by checking all my discs to see if any had anything useful on, and finding one with a couple of pics her on it... I think that must have been why. I usually dream about people I’ve either seen or spoken about recently. It was her, only she had a really deep tan and a large snake tattoo on her back.
by Ex Crimson Guard NCO at January 1, 2005 5:40 PM
I just got done watching Kate and Leopold. I know as a guy I should be watching football but my team is finished so I just don't care. Reviewers said it was Meg Ryan's Bad Hair Movie. By which they mean big actresses get an atrocious hairdo and do a movie to prove that she isn't Just a Pretty Face. I am an...artiste, dammit! And damned if they weren't right. It's the worst hair I have ever seen this side of Rosie O'Donnell's cereal-bowl-over-the head-and-clip-around-it do. All scraggly and uneven and lifeless. Yuk.
by Anna at January 1, 2005 5:47 PM
You gotta find a pic and post a link. :)
It's not worrying or unmanly for you to be watching a chick flick. But commenting on a womans hairdo in such a manner...
by Ex Crimson Guard NCO at January 1, 2005 6:49 PM
Well it seems the link function is disabled in comments so I put it into the post itself. Doesn't she look all just woke up after being picked up at a bar and wodering who the fuck this joker is?
by Anna at January 1, 2005 11:11 PM
When I'm lucky, I dream of friends having average of good times. Usually, I dream of triangle floating by making high frequency tones and I wake up shaking and screaming. It started when I was 2, and I still have the same nightmare. It doesn't take as long to shake off though, and I can sense them coming before I lapse(the period of half-sleep when thoughts become intangent) and you know you're about to sleep...
by LOCKHEED at January 2, 2005 9:12 AM
Crimson, being in england and all... how many freemasons do you know? i have an inkling that the NYC Lodge of Freemasons that I'm now part of are somewhat watered down?
by LOCKHEED at January 2, 2005 9:14 AM
Um I know there are three or four lodges in the city. One of my friends' fathers is a member I think, but whenever my friend has asked him about it he either cracks a joke or deflects the questions in some other way. To be honest I don't think he is a member of a lodge, but of a mock friendly society or something. My friend just likes telling people he has a dad clad in robes secretly influencing local government and its policies.
If there is one thing in this world about which I know positively nothing... It is Freemasons. I know there is the Chapter of the Ancient York Conclave of Redemption... And I only read that in a solitary passage in a book about knights.
Sorry Lockheed. I could probably go out and grab a stack of books, and use t’internet to tell you everything about England’s host of Freemasons, but I really don’t fancy it. Maybe when I’m older and wiser and too old to reach the toilet without wetting myself I’ll learn all about them. Probably only to realise they’ve been screwing me in some way or another, and then I’ll try to warn the youth around me, who’ll just laugh and call me stinky.
by Ex Crimson Guard NCO at January 2, 2005 1:33 PM
Meg’s Hairdo:
If you stick your finger over her face in the larger picture she could be anyone, my first thought was Heather Locklier... Though why I planted my finger over her face I don't know? I think it's because her face doesn't match the hairdo, it does look odd your right. I like Meg though she's sweet looking, definitely appealing to my eyes’ partiality scan-mode. :)
by Ex Crimson Guard NCO at January 2, 2005 1:44 PM
Going to see a movie for the first time in a while... the 'Clit' Eastwood boxing movie. Probably gonna fall asleep...
...anyways, why don't they play 'The Wanderers' on Sunday morning anymore? And NOT the WARRIORS, I mean the WANDERERS, equally good soundtracks though.
by LOCKHEED at January 2, 2005 5:54 PM
P.S. So far, I've had two meetings with the Northeast Freemasons, but nobody wears robes in my Lodge. But we have to wear suit and tie.
by LOCKHEED at January 2, 2005 5:55 PM
Aren't they like, in cahoots with the Illuminati, the UN and Israeli bankers and those black helicopters in some huge conspiracy to control everything?
by Anna at January 2, 2005 6:43 PM
Such is one reason why I was invited to join them. The Israeli Shekel connection. But it's hilarious, I 'seriously' can't say more than this. I took an 'oath' of sorts. It's really like the movies, I find it mildly entertaining, and a good respite from the other nonsense in my life.
by LOCKHEED at January 3, 2005 1:50 AM
What, is it like the old CIA maxim: I could tell you about it but then I'd have to kill you? Did you know that the CIA has its own store, full of tricky pens and phones and t-shirts? My wife shopped there recently.
by Anna at January 3, 2005 9:44 AM
Truthfully, I think the Freemasons are for Pent-Up Dorks like mysef. We actually have a Sister Organization that allows 'Women' into the mix(here in the U.S.), as always, we like to water down everything here. I don't think they would invite you if you didn't spend the day playing Jenga alone.
And what about the WANDERERS? Not the WARRIORS. Who's soundtrack is better?
by LOCKHEED at January 3, 2005 4:09 PM
CRIMSON:
What does 'Shitfruit' mean? Is it common? Like Bullshit?
by LOCKHEED at January 3, 2005 4:11 PM
Im reminded of that old song with the horns and the ska beat: "But I'm sure it isn't good. That's the impression that I get."
by Anna at January 3, 2005 6:09 PM
I have no idea, first time I've seen or heard the word Shitfruit.
I read little bit on about the Chapter I'd mentioned having heard of, and they only allow new initiates who are introduced by existing members. And it seems to be a Christian order too, though there are philosophical acolytes whose job it is to study the world religions and belief systems in depth.
I wonder how you go about asking one of your brighter friends if they want to join? Maybe over a beer before you extend your hand to teach the secret handshake?
by Ex Crimson Guard NCO at January 3, 2005 6:52 PM