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when the band plays "hail to the chief", ooh, they point the cannon at you
by mg at 11:32 AM on December 22, 2004
The fighting in Iraq won’t end until the U.S. leaves. The U.S. can’t leave Iraq until a stable, democraticish government is in place. They can’t have elections to establish a stable, democraticish government because there is still too much fighting.
It is a never-ending cycle.
The only thing that could possible fix the problem is to make John Kerry the president.
Of Iraq.
This makes sense for so many reasons I’m shocked no one has thought of this before. To begin with:
1) Will they even be able to hold elections over there next month? With each no car bombing, it is looking less and less like, despite our president’s assurances.
2) So, since elections are so tough (hell, we can’t even do it right here) let’s just screw the elections. No matter what happens in the January elections in Iraq, everyone is just going to assume the U.S. installed the government, so why not just install a government?
3) Our big concern about leaving Iraq too early is that some wacky religious fundamentalist leader will take control of that country. Kerry was the alternative to the wacky religious fundamentalist leader in this country, so he already knows how to play that role.
4) John Kerry is a bona-fide war hero. He has got like 19 purple hearts, 23 bronze stars, 57 silver stars, and 103 Medals of Honor. The U.S. has been unable to train the Iraq military sufficiently, but if anyone could do it John Kerry could.
5) Over and over throughout the campaign Kerry said that he would do a better job in Iraq and create international coalitions. Well, here is your chance, big boy!
Am I brilliant, or what? Maybe I can take over as Secretary of Homeland Security – I’ve probably got fewer skeletons in my closet than Bernie Kerik (but that ain’t saying much).
comments (11)
I weep. I weep. I weep... The lady soldier who went temporarily deaf due to epihelial nerve damage after the 'rocket' hit in Mosul Mess Hall... Send her home... Give her a purple heart...
...I weep. I weep. I weep.
by LOCKHEED at December 22, 2004 1:50 PM
I dunno. After all those years under the colorful, gun-toting Saddam, wouldn't Kerry come across as kind of a bore to the Iraqis? And along the same lines you suggest, the whole world thinks there's some ulterior oil motive behind the invasion. So what could we possibly lose by taking their damn oil for ourselves?
by anna at December 22, 2004 2:09 PM
Install a friendly deplorable government, and take the oil, and then sell that oil to your British cousins at low, low prices. I could use the extra coin. Police the world, and molest religious fundamentalists until they bow down in veneration of a greater world power. Get your service men and women home...
I'm happy for all of this to happen... But what the fething hell…
... Is WITH your President?
I weep, I weep, I weep when he opens his mouth, and I weep, I weep, I weep when he closes it again, only to stand on the spot shuffling from side to side like a five year old kid desperately needing to piss. His face contorts and shifts as he you watch him mentally forming the next corpus of senseless words he is about to spew.
I weep for you guys... The Republicans and Demo's... What a horrible choice to have to make. And if I feel sorry for you having to make that choice during an election, just imagine how I feel about misinformed Iraqi's being given a voice to elect a government. *shudders* Much safer to have one installed, me thinks.
by Ex Crimson Guard NCO at December 22, 2004 10:19 PM
Don Rumsfeld was once asked how he'd feel if a Taliban-style party won the supposed election over there. He was pretty emphatic that the occupying US force would never stand for that. So much of the "beacon of democracy" in the middle east.
by anna at December 23, 2004 10:36 AM
I can't help but feel that Iraqi's having living in the shadow of a totalitarian dictatorship for so long will only yearn to have another re-established. It strikes me that that kind of unremitting law bending might is all they’re capable admiring. I get the distinct feeling that they view democratic states as weak.
by Ex Crimson Guard NCO at December 23, 2004 1:57 PM
I wish I could edit that comment...
My grasp of the English language just dropped to the British national standard. Oh woe. :(
by Ex Crimson Guard NCO at December 23, 2004 1:59 PM
I think I can edit it. What do you want it to say?
by anna at December 23, 2004 4:39 PM
It's just missing words and sporting messed up letters... Don't worry about it. Thanks though. :)
by Ex Crimson Guard NCO at December 23, 2004 5:00 PM
I´ve just discovered this blog/site. I share the views of this poster, and it´s comforting to me that not everyone in the USA is the gun-touting, SUV-driving, anti-U.N., Limbaugh listener, Ann Coutler reader and pro-war advocate that sometimes the media would like us to believe.
A great president once warned about the danger of giving the Pentagon guys too much influence over foreign policy:
"In the councils of government, we must guard against the acquisition of unwarranted influence, whether sought or unsought, by the military-industrial complex. The potential for the disastrous rise of misplaced power exists and will persist."
~ President Dwight D. Eisenhower
And don´t forget this.... Rumsfeld and Reagan backed Saddam, and armed him, before he started disobeying the White House orders (or serving geopolitical interests of the day). The CIA even went as far as to recruit and train ¨radical islamists¨ (which later became the muhaiddin) to fight the soviets in Afghanistan.
Rumsfeld meets Saddam as Reagan's special envoy
http://i.cnn.net/cnn/2002/US/09/30/sproject.irq.regime.change/rumsfeld.80s.jpg
The only solution to this problem would be, imho, when the American society realizes that war is NOT the answer, and that backing dictatorships and puppet regimes throughout the world just because they serve US trade or foreign policy interests is a long-term menace for the world security.
Anyway, Merry Christmas folks! kudos from down under.
Peace!
Fernando
Buenos Aires, Argentina
by Fernando at December 24, 2004 2:48 AM
Blah!. I feel like an idiot. I missed the "of Iraq" part. ;)
Oh well, I forgot to install the sarcasm detection plug-in in my brain today.
Merry Christmas anyway to you. :)
Peace
F
by Fernando at December 24, 2004 2:51 AM
You need that sarcasm detector with MG. He is very sarcastic.
by anna at December 24, 2004 9:31 AM