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Slurp n' Burp is a bad name for a doll
by anna at 10:33 AM on November 28, 2004
I'm having immense difficulty reconciling myself to co-existing with dental dams, particularly the flavored variety.
Now I understand the underlying motivation. To wit, fear of contracting some nasty STD. But surely the strapping on of one these contraptions prior to performing such an act must sap every drop of spontanaity from it. Slipping on a condom is one thing, but this? I don't think so.
Blowjobs have been with is throughout time. Eve blew Adam. Mrs. Moses blew Moses. It's just glossed over in the Bible. Even more recently Monica blew Clinton with her presidential-seal kneepads and her Monica mints. Yet two things remain unexplained so far as I know: 1) How did he get away with failing to reciprocate in any meaningful way? I know she claims to have achieved the first orgasm of the relationship. But to call what they had a relationship is ludicrous. 2) Just how did that telltale stain get on her dress? Be it errant aim, spitting or whatnot, I don't want to know.
Now getting back to the flavored dams, I think they are a symptom of a much deeper and more sinister disease. So much of what we do these days is motivated by fear at the expense of fun and risk-taking. We grow more cautious and wary by the day. Part of this is that legions of noisy Chicken Littles barrage us with warnings of dire consequences heretofore unknown. So we retreat further and further into our dental dam/warning label/lo carb hell-shells.
Go ahead. Live a little. Go on a binge and purge bender. Eat the whole bottle of vitamins. Smoke crack. Shoot up. Fly naked. You only live once.
comments (14)
Done all that except shooting up, which is so ever appealing to me these days. I would definitely use the snortable softcore heroin if I had some... Anna, how bout, you come up to NYC around December 7th is and we find ourselves at the very least some cocaine and we'll have a blast. It would be great. C'mon, man... just drop me an email or a call...
917-568-8419 -lockheed
by LOCKHEED at November 28, 2004 1:31 PM
I been through all that. Now I am just eternally grateful to be alive. But I do visit NYC periodically and will look you guys up next time.
by anna at November 28, 2004 5:18 PM
A friend once told me that giving head with a dental dam was like eating candy with the wrapper still on.
by Leaffin at November 29, 2004 10:35 AM
Leaffin you say some pretty funny shit sometimes. Pleased to be telling us about the origin of your screen name and that other story you never told us. Can you post here?
by anna at November 29, 2004 10:50 PM
Origin of screen name isn't too special-- just a mixture of my first and last names. Snaggle was part of the crew who gave me the nickname. Posting, I don't know... I don't have the time to think up clever posts. Just time to write long comments.
As for the other story, are you talking about Colombia? Colombia, where the coke costs $5/gram? I was basically just working on becoming a cokehead for the week I was there. OK, one funny story. So, at the hotel I was staying at in Cartagena, there's a sign up saying that drugs aren't allowed. The group I was hanging out with ignored that and many many lines were done in one room where 4 guys were staying. So, one evening, the hotel owner goes to that room (and no others) to tell the boys that the cops were doing random checks of some hotel rooms in the area for drugs and that if they happened to have some, they should maybe hide them/get rid of them. The boys hid what they had and continued to hang out drinking rum and smoking cigarettes. After about 45 minutes, the owner came back over to tell they boys that the cops were done searching and they could resume using their drugs. Where else would that happen?
by Leaffin at November 30, 2004 2:09 PM
You have to love South and Central America. I'll have to post on the time I was in Santa Cruz, Bolivia sitting on fifteen kilos of pure coke and only ten arrived in La Paz. All I can say is CORRUPTION. Between the DEA, the UMOPAR (Bolivian drug police), and the soldiers no one could find the missing five. I suspected the DEA and UMOPAR. Shifty people, no doubt.
by Ezy at November 30, 2004 3:05 PM
Damn, Leaf, I really should come there.... of course, I'd have way too much fun, what with the coke and the men. Hm.
by snaggle at November 30, 2004 8:48 PM
Hid? You mean flush? It is funny to talk about kilos or grams or whatever of coke now. I can remember watching kilos disappear in a weekend, torched in pipes. And I remember that no matter how much there was, there was the endless search for errrant pieces we might have dropped earlier. Forget that, it's a dead-end street.
by anna at November 30, 2004 10:38 PM
Snaggle, the men are in Nicaragua (surfer boys with fab surfer boy bodies and skin about as dark as yours), the coke is in Colombia. Although I hear that there's a decent amount of coke here, too, though I have yet to personally use it here. But yes! Come visit me in Nicaragua! :)
by Leaffin at December 1, 2004 12:03 PM
WTF are you doing in those godforsaken places besides flirting with surfer boys and snorting rock? Tell me it isn't some altruistic crap.
by anna at December 1, 2004 8:04 PM
Colombia was a sidetrip after a friend convinced me to take a sailboat from Panama over there--- I was there for about a week.
Nicaragua sucked me in... I started out with Spanish classes, then got a job at as a bartender in exchange for room/board got me to stay. I left for about 5-6 weeks and have come back. Now I've graduated to bookkeeper and get tiny bit of money each day I work. I think I'll be here for another month or two. Mostly, I'm travelling and learning Spanish this year. Maybe I'll end up sticking around here for a few years.
by Leaffin at December 1, 2004 8:35 PM
xqpxuajdai poiuyt http://ghjklsmitsosul.com/
by Lewis at April 3, 2005 4:09 PM
yo
by jade at September 17, 2005 10:38 AM
In celebrating my 21st Birthday, I came up with the idea of HAVING SEX WITH A MAN FOR EVERY YEAR I"D BEEN ALIVE; and as my 45th Birthday is approaching and MY BOYFRIEND WILL BE AWAY: SHOULD I BE THE WHORE I WAS DESTINED TO BE????
by Henry Bagwell at April 9, 2006 9:00 PM