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I dress like Buddy Holly and you're Mary Tyler Moore
by anna at 06:29 PM on October 06, 2004
The trainee's sitting at my desk. She peers at a framed Glamour Shot and asks if it is my wife. When I tell her it is, she goes, "She's hot!"
Now this was a first. I've gotten used to women asking me if it's my wife and then saying she is pretty. But never hot. And I am always taken aback, at a loss how to respond. "Thanks," would be silly as I played no role in creating her beauty or for that matter in posing her with hair all done up, makeup, head slightly cocked with black gloves curled gracefully under her chin. "Yeah she is," seems flippant and disrespectful. "Ya think?" doesn't work either. That implies that I disagree.
You'll note I said women. No guy has ever dared to comment on the provocative photo. To do so would be to say he covets my wife and would love to jump her bones. It would be seen as a challenge of sorts. So it simply isn't done. Nor do guys make any inane comments about the pictures of my kids. God knows how I'd react if they said my stepdaughters look hot.
There's hot and there's pretty. Many consider Angelina Jolie hot but not pretty. Just as many consider Nicole Kidman pretty but not hot. My wife is pretty but I don't care to think of her in terms of temperature.
Speaking of marriage, I caught this show called What I Hate About You. They get couples to come on and dish about one another's annoying tendencies. The guy was a metrosexual who thought nothing of dropping $400 on lotions and shampoo. She took in a menagerie of strays including a mangy dog. For reasons unclear he wound up bathing the mutt with his pricey shampoo and conditioner.
I tried to think of what I'd say if we were on there. I couldn't think of anything. My wife is pretty close to flawless. All I could think of is her refusal to use her mirrors when driving. She scares me half to death turning her head all the way around before changing lanes. That and the way she calls me at work asking where certain household items might be. She's convinced I have a photographic memory, a detailed mental catalogue of everything we own. I don't.
And that is about it. Pretty damn good after 16 years.
comments (8)
Anna, I don't think it's at all out of line to say "thank you" or to say "she is, isn't she?" if someone compliments your wife, especially since you've been together long enough that you've probably started fusing into one entity. I mean, even your wife isn't really responsible for creating her own beauty. You can thank them since she's not there to do it.
You also made me laugh with this post, because I too turn my head to change lanes. No matter how you angle those mirrors they cannot give you the full story of what might be directly behind you. Personally, I find it more frightening that people rely on small mirrors to hurl their car into another lane.
by Linz at October 7, 2004 11:11 AM
That's what I usually say, like it's something I just noticed. "She is, isn't she?" But to the "hot" comment I was just lost.
She doesn't just turn her head all the way around. She's not real good at judging how much space she needs to merge so she'll gun the engine while looking backwards. Eek!
by anna at October 7, 2004 6:18 PM
You know, I'm faced with this same problem with my infant child. No, not people think she is hot. But when people say "Oh what a cure baby" or whatever. The wife and I have decided not to be humble in the least about this. When someone tells us how beautiful Franny is, we agree completly "Yes, she is beautiful, isn't she?" If you can't crow about your great kids, or if you were lucky enough to score a hot wife (how were you able to pull that one of Anna?), why not be proud of it?
by mg at October 7, 2004 8:04 PM
re: What I Hate About You
I once had an arguement with my (now ex) girlfriend which resulting in me coming up with the idea that we each write down things that annoyed us about the other person. We sat at oppersite ends of a room and got to hastily scribbling on our sheets of paper. While she was busy jotting down a long list of my tiny little annoying faults I set about repeating the words "I love you as you are" over and over and over. During these tense moments I'd keep looking over at her, pretending to think of another fault and write it down. The more I did it the more she seemed to find as well.
In the end we handed our sheets of paper over and as I read the first entry on her list ("thinks he's soooooo smart"), she took in what I'd done and quickly snatched her long list back off me. She scribbled out the word "thinks" on that first line and gave it back to me.
by Fuzzy at October 8, 2004 2:04 AM
MG, I just don't know. I have a job, but that's about it. And yeah, even if you have a hideous looking baby, everybody has to ooh and aah about how cute it is. So why not go along with it?
Fuzzy, that is a great story. Why aren't y'all still together?
by anna at October 8, 2004 7:55 AM
Having met Anna's wife, I can say that she is quite a looker. How she and Amy ended up with a couple of goons like us is beyond me. I guess we're just lucky, huh Anna? Either that or they like to take in strays.
by Ezy at October 8, 2004 8:37 AM
I think (like Linz) "thank you" is just fine to say, and if you felt like clarifying you could always add "...for complimenting my wife." There's a difference between thanking someone for offering a compliment, and taking credit for a compliment. Perhaps something like, "How nice of you to say that!" would give you the option of accepting the compliment and rewarding them in return.
That was a nice little story Fuzzy. Reminds me of a past life.
by chris at October 8, 2004 12:09 PM
Well I'm sure it's been addressed in some Emily Post etiquette thing.
Ezy, it's the luck of the Irish. Except I'm Swedish. And thanks for the complement of my better half.
Hey, I am listening to Brian Wilson's Smile. It's well worth the 38 year wait. Buy it.
by anna at October 8, 2004 6:36 PM