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Smoking in the boysroom

by anna at 08:42 AM on April 25, 2004

In a nutshell, a 15 year old girl accused three classmates of raping her in a school bathroom. One supposedly acted as a lookout while another held her down so a third could have his way with her. The alleged assailants were 15, 16 and 18. The tale has the additional detail of a racial angle in that she's white, they are black and they all live in an affluent enclave known as Howard County. Oh my, fur is going to fly.

Investigators interviewed other students and soon realized they'd erred in jailing the trio and charging them as adults with rape. All charges will be dropped as the girl recanted her story when confronted. Seems what occured on that cold linoleum was purely consensual if a tad tacky.

Now this raises a couple questions in my mind. In Maryland it is considered statutory rape to have sex (or a "sex act" as the 18 year old says he had) with a person under 16. How come no one is being charged with that? Could it be that authorities don't want to deal with double standard accusations when the parents of the 15 year old boy claim she statutorily raped him?

But far more troubling is the girl's mother's reaction. Even after her daughter took back the sordid allegations, she continues to maintain that her original story is true. When you consider that it had to be embarassing as hell for cops to drop the charges they'd so hastily filed, it seems almost certain that the girl did indeed recant her tale to them.

In other words, this mom would rather believe that her daughter was brutally raped by three guys in a bathroom, emotionally scarred for life, than to believe that she is either psychologically troubled or simply of iffy moral character. What kind of mother would think like that? Why wouldn't she apologize to the guys and say she was going to seek out counseling for her kid? Or better yet, just keep her mouth shut?

Somehow this story strikes me as a parable for all that is so screwed-up about modern society. Am I as wrong as the Howard County police were?

comments (10)

No, you're right. That mother is messed up. I hope nobody believes her. Sometimes when I've seen that kind of behavior up close, it seems to come from some sense of self-preservation. For instance, maybe she and the daughter have been fighting and this is the daughter's cry for help. The mother refuses to even acknowledge the cry for help, because then the whole house of cards is going to fall. And you never know what the family's hiding. Maybe it's just a teen rebellion and respect issue, but it could be domestic violence, molestation/incest, alcoholism... the sky's the limit.

I hope I don't sound alarmist. But I can count several instances of each of the above among people I know. In those situations, tensions are sky-high within the household, and people get twisted in very strange ways indeed.

by jean at April 25, 2004 11:25 PM

I hadn't thought of that. There definitely must be some self-respect issues here. Soon after I wrote this, I heard Nickelback's new song. It has comforting lyrics like "I love your lack of self-respect," "I love my hands around your neck" and of course "I love the way you still say please when you're looking up at me." Maybe that's part of the problem too.

by anna at April 26, 2004 7:48 AM

The mother's 'public' reaction seems to make sense. Why would she publicly admit that her daughter is slightly 'askew'? Also, I'm sure she dislikes 'blacks'. Above all, the situation is sick no matter what way you look at it. Sick girl, Sick Boys, and a total lack of education.

by lockheed at April 26, 2004 1:58 PM

I think Lockheed's right about the mother. Most parents wouldn't get on tv and say "Hey, my daughter's a whore and she got busted have'n a threesome with some black guys in the school bathroom then lied and said she was raped". As for the girl, maybe it was an out cry for help or maybe she's just alittle slut and thought it'd be good fun.

by Jerry at April 26, 2004 3:03 PM

i agree with JERRY that maybe this girl is acting as if had happen bc she is a slut. but think how would you feel after this rape happened? you would want people to believe you right, in her case she may seem like she would do that but then again maybe she led them on and something else my have happened. you never know if she was willing to have sex with them or if was officially rape. the 18 year old should have known better and her mom is wack. her mom is acting like nothing happened, meanwhile the 15 accused the girl of raping him. keep the story straight, if she wanted attention she just should have gotten really drunk instead of risking STD'S and AIDS. thats really stupid bc that isnt funny to be joking about. the girls a slut, the moms a dumbass, the guys and manwhores. that is totally wrong think before you act and think before you say!!

by LEXI at April 26, 2004 6:03 PM

I realize they are teens who tend to finish pretty quickly. But you've got to figure at least 5-6 minutes a pop, longer if the "sex act" was what I thought. Where were the school authorities all this time?

And let me just say that when no weapons are involved, we should view oral rape charges with a healthy dose of skepticism. Wouldn't the assailant be afraid she'd (or he'd) bite it off like that Chicago women did a while back?

by anna at April 26, 2004 6:11 PM

It's not really 18 - the age of consent varies by state and is anywhere from 13 to 18, depending on the state and gender. Yep, gender. For instance here in Texas, it is 15 for males, but 16 for females. Most statutes also have a provision for the age difference - so, for example, an 18 year old boy will not be guilty of statutory rape for having sex withy a 16 year old girl.
A quick search turns up the Maryland law (disclaimer: just found this on the state site - but don't go having sex based on it :) ) :

(3) Sexual contact with another person who is under 14 years of age and the person performing the sexual contact is four or more years older than the victim; or

(4) A sexual act with another person who is 14 or 15 years of age and the person performing the sexual act is at least 21 years of age; or

(5) Vaginal intercourse with another person who is 14 or 15 years of age and the person performing the act is at least 21 years of age.

So, that's a somewhat typical example. It protects teenagers from being teenagers - but still makes someone under 16 jailbait for someone 21 or older.

by Charles at April 26, 2004 6:29 PM

What's the difference between a slut and someone who's sexually assertive? One is male, the other is female. All these people are in their teens, thinking with their gonads, so their behavior doesn't surprise, or really bother me, at all - as long as it really was consensual. It's crazy and damnable for the girl to make up false accusations, she hurts herself, and all other women when she does that. Her mother - could be whacked, but it could also be that the girl was slightly coerced, such that the line between consent and tolerance could become somewhat blurred, and the mother could simply be holding onto that part of it that involves coercion. And then of course the press has to cast everything in black and white, because complicated stories aren't newsworthy.

by chris at April 26, 2004 6:36 PM

Charles thanks for the clarification. I've always wondered how they come up with that magic age where all of the sudden you can give consent.

When I was 16 I did a 12 year old but I didn't know. She looked old enough that she could buy liquor without getting carded. In fact, she did that day. Was I guilty?

Chris, I totally agree. My guess is she wanted to do it with one of the guys but not the whole gang, that just sort of developed. But the press can't process nuance.

by anna at April 26, 2004 6:47 PM

Smoking in the boysroom

by anna at 08:42 AM on April 25, 2004

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