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sometimes you think you're gonna get it but you don't and that's just the way it goes
by mg at 03:40 AM on January 27, 2003
I’m not much of a whore.
Hanging out Saturday night, the conversation turned to sex, as any conversation involving a group of inebriated adults does. Now, if we were a group of really inebriated adults, we all would have just dropped trou and orgied right there on the karaoke bar floor.
Sure, we talked about butt plugs and genital warts, but eventually the topic turned from warm frivolities to cold, hard numbers. Now, it was obvious when we started down that road, considering I was in a room of gay men and bi women, but I’ve had the least number of sexual partners. What was surprising was that I had the least partners by a factor of a hundred.
Yesterday being Sunday, I thought about sex all day. Apparently, there was some sort of “Super Bowl” on. I was too busy thinking about sex to have anything do with it. I even skipped church. Okay, I did get to church, but I just thought about sex the whole time. Come on though, when the vicar slips that communion wafer in your mouth, what could be sexier?
And after all that thinking I decided I want to be a whore. I’m still young, I should be out banging hot chicks left and right. No more will I see a pretty girl in a coffee shop and be afraid to talk to her. Not only am I going to talk to those girls, but I’m going to fuck them right there on the Starbucks sofa. Damn, in order to get my numbers up, I might even start sleeping with dudes.
In fact, I’m having sex with a chick as I’m typing this. Lkfd’lkj dfsa’jkp asdfjk; asdfpkj’ ads’kjf adsjk’ asdfjkkja;ldsl;dsfklja; asjd;kdsa;lsadf;adsf;jkld’a aoeopaepegaooaoj’pa’. All I’m saying is, buy stock in Trojan.
comments (16)
The point of this post, as stupid as it is, was to announce the start of Blogwhores 2. It’s a Survivor like game, and I’m a contestant. What’s more, I’m going to win, even if I have to dance around naked and form an alliance with a retired Navy seal, and a bitchy female trucker.
I can’t win alone. I need your help. Go visit all the sites from the links above. Leave comments, and make sure they know I sent you (but be respectful).
More importantly, if you’ve got a website of your own, you need to link to Blogwhores and make sure to say you’re doing it because of me. Then, ping this post, leave a comment, or drop me a note letting me know you’ve linked Blogwhore up. You’d be doing me a huge favor, and even if it means I’ll have trouble sitting down for a couple days after, I always pay back my favors. Stay tuned for my Blogwhore info.
by mg at January 27, 2003 3:48 AM
wow cool layout, neat.. you got a whole lotta content!
by logan at January 27, 2003 3:58 AM
Oh Logan, it isn't about the size of your content, it's how the words move you.
by mg at January 27, 2003 4:32 AM
I still don't know what "ping" means, but it reminds me of a nipple being flicked...
by Linz at January 27, 2003 8:30 AM
I did it for you, MG.
http://cellophane-girl.diary-x.com
by Lucy at January 27, 2003 9:50 AM
Linz, that's EXACTLY what "ping" means. Good intuition!
by Eviltom at January 27, 2003 10:34 AM
Yes, thats why I love it when people ping me. Though, I'd rather have them pong me, I'm a little too embarrassed to ask someone to do that in such a public forum.
by mg at January 27, 2003 10:42 AM
heeheehee!
by Linz at January 27, 2003 11:57 AM
I pinged ya, ya blogwhore. :p
by skits at January 27, 2003 5:28 PM
Of course I haven't a clue about all this blogese stuff. But I did post a comment on the photo site. Liked it too.
by Anna at January 27, 2003 7:08 PM
OK, dolomite, I've done the blogwhore thing. I think. Well, see for your self: http://blank.badsamaritan.com/
by MrBlank at January 27, 2003 11:23 PM
MrBlank, you are a genius.
by Lucy at January 27, 2003 11:52 PM
I'll say. Nice boob jobs. When I wrote the satirical piece about transforming MG into a pimp, I wanted to take his thumbnail and merge it with a pimp shot. Then I'd have posted it along with the piece. But I hadn't a clue how to do that. Nice sketch, Mr. Blank.
by Anna at January 28, 2003 8:36 AM
They don't have boob jobs. All chicks in comic book land look like that.
by MrBlank at January 28, 2003 9:17 AM
Done, you're linked up.
by sam at January 28, 2003 1:14 PM
You are such a whore and I've let everyone know over at my site. ;o)
by Sydney at January 28, 2003 2:45 PM