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you got your hair combed back and your sunglasses on, baby
by mg at 12:29 AM on June 20, 2002
Way back in the day, in the halcyon summer of 2001, Snaggle suggested the idea of a Summer of Sin. He lived his summer of sin, filled with drugs, innumerable alcoholic stupors, and plenty of hot man on man sex.
I spent that summer unemployed, unhappy and unloved. And then I spent the fall, winter and spring much the same way.
So, when the weather started warming up a couple weeks ago I started thinking about making 2002 my summer of sin.
But then I remembered I don’t do drugs (a condition of parole agreement), I don’t have the kind of cash you need to be an alcoholic in New York City, and I lost the use of my wiener in a strange and tragic change machine accident.
So then I started thing about what other sorts of summer I could be having. It could be the Summer of Trying to Decide Which Met is Gay. Going to every home game, sitting on the first base side and throwing my underwear into the Mets dugout to see who takes a sniff instead of just signing it and handing it back.
And, I’d really love to do that, but I don’t have money for season tickets. I’ve also got a feeling this season will end in heartbreak and cries of “Just wait ‘till next year.” I just don’t want to put myself through that; I’ve got a delicate heart. Besides, I already know it’s Alomar. Hi Bobby!
I could make this the Summer of American Idol. I could walk around singing really badly, wearing obnoxious clothing, and then make fun of myself in a British accent. And then I could run into another room crying, only to be consoled by an ambiguously gendered Chilean karaoke champion.
Alternatively I could have been a Laker girl, than a star for a brief shining moment before, dancing with a cartoon cat and now be at such a low point in my career I can’t even get a gig on Hollywood Squares.
But I’d never do that because I’ve got more than an ounce of self-respect.
I ran through dozens of ideas, none of which really struck a chord. Finally, I decided to declare this to be the Summer of Not Being Afraid to Make a Fool of Myself. Sure, it doesn’t quite have the ring of the Summer of Sin, but it is something I could probably pull off. In fact, making a fool of myself is something I’m actually quite good at.
But, this summer isn’t about making a fool of myself, though I’m sure that will be a residual result. No, this summer is about not being afraid to make a fool of myself. As Yoda said, before we knew how bad he really was, “Fear is the mind killer.”
There are so many things I face on a daily basis, from little crisis to big opportunities, that I freak out about, don’t do, because I’m afraid of what will happen. Now, that is a very safe way to go through life, never getting hurt, never facing the consequences. But, it isn’t fun way to live.
In gambling circles, they say you need to bet big to win big. I’m guessing. But, even if that isn’t a real saying, the moral is valid. To really experience life, you need to experience the failures with the successes.
That is why this will be my Summer of Not Being Afraid to Make a Fool of Myself. Whenever I’m faced with a situation that causes that pesky little voice in my head to start in with the “Michael, buddy, maybe you shouldn’t…” I’ll punch myself in the gut and say, “Shut the fuck up motherfucker.” Then I’ll go right ahead and do whatever silly or stupid thing I’d never have done otherwise.
I’m not exactly sure what this summer will have in store for me, what opportunities and disasters await, but I do know that whatever comes up my one and only response will be “Hell Yeah.” This may end up being my worst summer over, ending with broken limbs, shattered dreams, empty bank accounts and venereal diseases, but one thing is for sure, I damn well wont be bored.
So, bring on the summer.
comments (19)
So, I was about to get all indignant because I'd finally posted something that was remotely positive, instead of all my whiney bitching, and no one bothered to comment on it. I was just about to comment on that myself when, upon clicking the "...more" link, I was taken to Microsofts hateful "The page cannot be displayed" page. I guess the moral of this comment is don't count your comments before they are 404'ed.
by mg at June 20, 2002 5:12 PM
I will, however, get all peeved because only one person emailed me to tell me something was wrong. So, really, the moral is to stay angry always, but make sure to always be angry about the right thing.
by mg at June 20, 2002 5:14 PM
right on!
by Girlw/KaleidoscopeEyes at June 20, 2002 5:56 PM
Are you done bitching yet?
by space at June 20, 2002 6:26 PM
Hell yeah!
by mg at June 20, 2002 7:14 PM
mg, did you learn your web programming concepts from a pack of wolves? your first comment is technically incorrect, or at least, it's technically incoherent.
"...don't count your comments before they are 404'ed..."
i see by my handy dandy HTTP protocol handbook that 404 means "Not Found." so, your comment is really saying, don't count your comments before they are not found. where's the sense in that?
i think you meant to use HTTP code 200 (OK), or at the very least, code 304 (Not Modified), which means that the page was cached locally.
on a semi-related note, my favorite HTTP code is 312, which is the code for "Request Entity Too Large." (that's what she said.) AWWWW-YEAH.
by Eviltom at June 20, 2002 7:28 PM
I'm so glad I don't have a favorite HTTP code.
I do, however, have a favorite wireless networking protocol, so I should shut the hell up.
by Eric at June 20, 2002 9:29 PM
I take it this Summer of Not Being Afraid to Make a Fool of Yourself had its official start Saturday night?
by Chris at June 20, 2002 11:17 PM
Hell I am begining to think that ALL you men BITCH a ton more than we woman! hehe.... In all honesty though that 404 code actually means that the request was not responded to and cannot therefor be located which equals - ERROR. :-) Techies, I love you guys each and one every's of you!
by Pristine at June 21, 2002 12:44 AM
btw, it's (your tag title) hehe....
"You got your hair pulled back and your RAYBANS on BAyyyyyBeee, I can still see......." Don Henley, boys of summer, to which I LOVE them boys of summer and of course the song. (HEY I HAD to get a woman's bitch in here you know?) :-)
by Pristine at June 21, 2002 12:46 AM
Ok, I'm curious here, and quite frankly surprised Pristine hasn't asked yet, but does this Summer of Not Being Afraid to Make a Fool of Yourself = You finally caving in about the cowboy boot pics??
by Girlw/KaleidoscopeEyes at June 21, 2002 9:21 AM
THANK YOU GIRL"W", I was going to but you know I figured I better not beat a dead dog ya know, but since you asked it, YEAH MG, does that mean? DO we get to SEE? WILL YOU? WHEN? YOU DID SAY YOU WOULD you know? :-)
by Pristine at June 21, 2002 9:35 PM
Wasn't that Shar's idea?
by Andrew at June 22, 2002 12:20 AM
Nevermind who, WHEN is the real question!
by Girlw/KaleidoscopeEyes at June 22, 2002 4:02 PM
could have been but then I don't recall Shar being involved in the chat that several of us were in where MG promised me he would do a pic of him in his cowboy boots....
by Pristine at June 23, 2002 5:18 PM
I think Andrew meant the Summer of Sin. Not everything is about cowboy boots Pris.
by mg at June 23, 2002 9:37 PM
mg getting testy!
by Eviltom at June 24, 2002 11:11 AM
Quench the Thirst of Frizzy Hair
By Diana Dudas
It seems like such an enigma. Of the hundred or so emails I receive daily, the same question pops up endlessly. “Why is my hair so, FRIZZY and dry, coarse or brittle?” I intend to try and solve this mystery. And my first clue has to do with moisture deficiency!
Oil and Water...
90% of us suffer with dry brittle or frizzy hair because our hair is deficient of (moisture) WATER! There is a certain preconceived notion that has been passed on from generation to generation. That is the idea that our hair is dry, because we are lacking in natural oils. We are told that if we nurture our hair by brushing vigorously 100 times a day, or if we nurture our hair with hot oil treatments and cholesterols. If we do all of these things, then we are sure to be blessed with beautiful, shiny and healthy locks. This might be the case, if you have young virgin (hair that is not chemically treated) hair. But this is certainly not the case, once you have impaled your tresses, with harsh chemicals such as bleaches and alkaline permanents. Or if you have naturally curly hair,
Naturally Curly Hair...
Those of you who have curly hair, have these curls, because of a curvature of the hair follicles .A normal hair follicle under a microscope would be seen as perfectly straight. However yours would have a definite bend in it. This causes the hair to curl. Where the hair curves it compels the cuticle (the outer layer of the hair) to lift.
The cuticle...
Under a microscope, A cuticle is similar in appearance to shingles on a roof. When the hair is in good condition, and is straight and has good porosity the tiles or cuticle layers are tight together and in perfect in shape, giving the hair a smooth appearance. This makes light reflect off the hair enhancing shine! When hair is in bad conditioner, is curly or has poor porosity, the cuticle layers are lifted and sometimes damaged and broken. This makes the hair feel coarse and brittle. It also causes the hair to absorb light, giving the appearance of dull lifeless hair.
To sum up this scenario. Because curly haired cuticle layer is permanently lifted, it feels, coarse, and brittle and has no brilliance. Hence the dull, lifeless look. It also means that our hair has poor porosity.
Porosity...
Is the ability for hair to be able to absorb and retain moisture. The best way for me to explain this is to would be for you to imagine a sponge. First of all imagine a brand new sponge. It will have tiny holes in it, and when you immerse it in water, it will soak up a large quantity, and be able to hold that liquid for a long period of time. This is because it has good porosity. Now imagine an old sponge. Its holes have become damaged and distorted. It might even be torn in some areas. When you immerse this sponge in the same amount of liquid, it will absorb far less and will certainly not be able to retain the moisture so readily.
It is the same with hair. Hair that has poor porosity will not be able to absorb or retain moisture as well as hair that has good porosity. making hair permanently dry.
Hot oil treatments...
Traditions have taught many of us that lavishly applying oil to our hair will give us the soft, shiny hair that we all desire. However more often than not, the opposite takes place. Most oils if they are not essential oils do not have the ability to penetrate into the hair shaft. Nor do heavy cholesterols. What they will do, is to lay on top of the cuticle, and coat the cuticle. This may give the hair some Brilliance. However, it will also coat the hair. And causes product build up.
Product build up...
Once the hair is coated, your problems will commence. First of all, the moisture that our hair so desperately needs will not be able to permeate through the wall of product build. The moisture is then not able to find it’s way underneath the cuticle layer. The hair cannot then be conditioned. Also the oils will not diffuse, but sit on top of the cuticle layer. If you use any kind of hot styling tools such as blow dryers or hot irons, what will happen to your hair, is exactly what happens when you put an egg into a hot pan. It will fry!
If you live in a sunny climate, the oil will do the same thing. The sun will heat the oil and fry your hair. You must have heard the term, my hair feels fried.
Optimum condition...
For hair to be in tiptop conditioner is has to have a moisture (water) content of at least 8%, and the right balance of protein and natural oil. Most of us produce enough natural oil (sebum), to keep our hair healthy, but lack the moisture. After having a chemical service your moisture level will drop as low as 2%, causing, drying of the hair, followed by split ends. The same will happen with constant use of blow-dryers and hot styling tools, such as curling or flat irons. If the moisture level is not restored to it’s optimum 8%; by the use of good moisturizing products your hair will ultimately become brittle and possibly break.
What to do...
You need to give your hair lots of TLC, with shampoos that are designed to restore your hair’s moisture level to its optimum 8%. Along with intense conditioners that will help to repair damaged cuticles, improve porosity, elasticity and general health and appearance of your hair. Avoid product build by using products that contain natural ingredients. Also avoid hot oil treatments, heavy cholesterol type conditioners, petroleum-based and silicone-based products. Also hairsprays, mousses and gels that have a high alcohol or butane content.
Those of you with naturally curly, wavy or frizzy hair, those of you who use hot styling tools or who chemically treat your hair, will need to give your hair extra nurturing by supplying it with the necessary nutrition and moisture that it needs. Sun worshippers need to make sure that your hair care products have sunscreen properties to protect your hair from the damaging affects of the UV rays.
Summary...
Our hair needs MOISTURE, MOISTURE, and MOISTURE! Who needs to add moisture more than most? People with naturally curly hair, chemically treated, hot styling tool users or people who live in hot sunny and arid climates.
Please feel free to email me with any hair care questions that you may have at DUDASDIANA@AOL.COM
Copyright ã2002
Author is an expert with more than 28 years experience in the beauty industry. She has answered over 2000 questions for allexperts.com and has had her work published in many well-respected beauty magazines both online and off.
by DIANA DUDAS at September 22, 2003 8:42 AM
i have naturally curly hair thats a little less curly... more wavy and i want to know what kind of shampoo and conditioner to use. its long and im trying to grow it out longer. i see all these girls with wavy hair and they say that their hair is naturally curly. what products would i use to make my hair wavy instead of curly?
by casi y. at October 25, 2003 1:22 AM