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I'm just an excitable boy....

by northstar at 09:45 AM on February 28, 2002

Send lawyers, guns, and money The shit has hit the fan.

- Warren Zevon

This week�s reasons why the Apocalypse is upon us:

1) How can you tell when Jeff Skilling is lying? Check to see if his lips are moving.

2) The US is sending troops to Georgia to help in the war against terrorism. Hey, whatever works. Besides, Atlanta is lovely this time of year.

3) The Shrub Administration has announced plans to reduce Internet access for the poor. It makes perfect sense, I suppose- the poor generally don�t donate to Republicans anyway.

4) The Houston Astros bought back the naming rights to their ballpark from Enron. If they really wanted to make an impact, they could sell the naming rights to a personal hygiene company. How about Vagisil Field, Monistat Stadium, Beano Ballpark?

5) Shrub�s latest effort is a piece of political puffery supporting marriage and employment. I wonder how many late nights his staffers put in coming up with that one? I suppose it makes sense, though, since the plan pushing recreational sex, welfare dependence, and needle exchanges wasn�t exactly a hit among Shrub�s core right-wing Christian nutcase constituency.

6) The Presbyterian Church has decided once and for all that God loves heterosexuals more than homosexuals. I suppose that on some primal level it�s good to know that bigotry and discrimination is alive and well. Life can be so dull when you have no one to marginalize.

7) Fully 50% of the hits on my website have been coming from people doing Google searches for naked pictures of Jamie Sale, the Canadian figure skater. Y�all must have way too much time on your hands, particularly the person who was searching for �naked curling pics�. Ewwwwww��

8) The big news in the art world is the gallery show in Birmingham, England that features a video loop of 10 Cuban men performing sex acts on each other. You just can�t make this stuff up�.

comments (5)


by jenn at February 28, 2002 11:12 AM

And bothe The Reba and Bob Saget shows are STILL ON.

by Charles at February 28, 2002 4:57 PM

Jesus H. Christ - and then I just saw this!

by Charles at February 28, 2002 5:02 PM

Some Cubans doing the unspeakable...it's art. Who are we to judge?

by jesus at February 28, 2002 6:33 PM

Naked Curling League - we get the rocks off

by NCL at February 18, 2006 6:28 PM

comments are closed