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mg

this news is no news

by mg at 04:03 PM on January 11, 2001

Too tired to write. Go read this stuff:

Life imitates Norm as city official hires dog.

In order to make passengers happy, Paris officials now offer

tea and massages. Having ridden the Paris subway, I don't think any massage could get me down there again, unless it were to involve me, nudity, Angelina Jolie, some lubricant, a zucchini and a live hamster.

Even the good folks of Germany can't manage to do "Who want's to Marry a Millionaire" right. How shocking, they did such a good job with those two wars.

You can't make this stuff up - "Expatriate Scots from the U.S. to Australia are being forced into the shadowy world of international haggis smuggling... due to import bans on the dish, traditionally made from boiled up lamb, beef and oatmeal stuffed into a cow's intestine." I'm not one to yuck another person's yum, but yuck. So very very yuck.

This story is more fun than a barrel full of genetically engineered monkeys. Oh wait, they aren't available in day glo colors. These monkeys are no fun at all!

Speaking of monkeys... What kind of backward society do these people live in when the fact that "thousands of monkeys are invading government buildings in Delhi, forcing employees to arm themselves with sticks and stones" is seen as something relatively normal.

Well, as my mom always used to say "Sticks and stones may break a normal monkey's bones, but what good will they be against a race of genetically engineered super monkeys"?